Falling for you

Chapter 1
I was losing my mind.
That was the only explanation I had, I was a priest it's something I took pride in.
It was my goal since I was 22 years till now.
Surviving a horrible accident and losing friends in a tragic way changes a man, I was the only survival of a heads on collision that killed the other three riders in the car, I lost my brother and my two best friends in the accident. It broke to millions of pieces that I didn't think I would survive.
I started thinking maybe I survived for a reason and decided to give my life to God, and this thinking saved me for the past 10 years.
Was I ever tempted by women, not really no, for years after the accident even the thought of having sex gave me dry hives, you see we were speeding to go for what can be called an orgy, so related or not sex wasn't in my mind in a positive way.
Was I ever propositioned? Hell yes, I was a good looking healthy black man in the prime of his life, I was an authority figure. But I didn't care, I never faltered, that's until Emilia Hector entered my church.
We had a nice sized church, a nice sized mixed parish but it was pretty much the same people every single week, so an outsider was quite easy to spot.
I worked with one of my best friends father Rodrigo and we had a nice comfortable routine going on.
Till the I day was told there is a new volunteer for our soup kitchen that I should come and meet, it was a version of pep talk I think but we liked the personal touch.
And that was how I met Emilia and God help me one look at her and I was gone.
"Hi, I'm father Garrett Patrick, nice to meet you."
Taking her hands in mine was a moment of pure ecstacy, she wasn't the most beautiful Konak Travestileri woman in earth like the cliché would go.
She was pale white, curvy as hell, and looked more in the pretty cute range than the beautiful one, put my cock long dormant took notice once I touched her hands.
I felt embarrassed and taken back, this was not normal, it was wrong but i just couldn't control it.
She seemed shy and wary, like something was scaring her and I wished I could help but my weird reaction to her prevented me from prying.
I needed to leave, I needed to pray this craziness would go away, but as I excused myself I knew in my heart it was just the beginning.
Chapter 2
If you asked me to describe myself, it would be a skittish, Lilly white, overweight virgin. I didn't have a lot of illusions about myself.
With the nasty excuse of parents I had it was easy to see where my Self-esteem issues came from but it wasn't worth the price of the therapy really.
You may ask how I managed to get to the age of 30 while still being a virgin and the story will include my parents almost selling me to a nasty piece of work, I caught his eyes and he could give them a supply of drugs and racism that validated their stupid existence, so I took what I can and ran in the middle of the night, changed my name through not so very legal means and that was just that.
But having a virgin body doesn't insure you having a virgin my mind and since my thoughts and fantasies where driving me crazy, I started writing them 5 years ago and started making a decent living under an assumed name.
I started to go to churches and soup kitchens out of loneliness more than a religious drive, I realized Konak Travesti if I left it to myself I would end up being a hermit and I didn't risk my life running just to hide behind a laptop screen forever.
It was all good and well until I met him father Garrett, I bet he would freak if he knew what I was thinking about when he touched my hands.
He was every single fantasy and dream I could ever have, tall, tattooed, beautiful chocolate skin, he was gorgeous and huge, like he just came out of my dreams but he was wrapped in a priest's collar.
The funny thing was that even if he wasn't a priest he was way out of my league he might as well be in a foreign postal code, but I could consule myself by blaming the priesthood for getting him first.
Since that day every visit to the church become a lesson in self endurance, I would get embarrassingly wet every time I heard his voice.
I felt his eyes on me all the time, and even though I knew it was some public speaking trick I couldn't shake my crazy.
I couldn't stay away, I was always extremely shy about my body and maybe my parents teachings were always in my head so I always failed miserably at masturbating, I would watch the videos, read the stories but be left out aroused and vaguely ashamed.
So I was at the end of my rope when he found me sitting on a bench in front of the lake.
"Miss Emilia."
"Hi,father."
"May I intrude on you."
"Of course father, you're always welcome. "
"Can you call me Garrett? we are not overly formal here."
I can feel my blush coming, I don't want to examine if it's from shyness or arousal really.
"Of course I would love to Garrett."
"So how are you Travesti konak liking our town so far?"
"It's amazing, I'm really enjoying my time, have you lived here long?"
"Well I grew up in a town near by, so I get to be close to some of my childhood friends. "
"So close to family then?"
I notice his facial expression and I realize family seems like a touchy subject, I rush to touch his hands.
"I'm sorry that was very insensitive of me."
"I'm the only one left and no it was a valid question so don't bother."
We are both silent for a while, staring at the lake, I feel him gently tracing my hand with his fingers, he feels so solid, so safe.
I didn't know the man but I wanted to barrow inside his arms and never leave.
"If you don't mind me asking Emilia?"
"Hmm, yes."
"Can I ask you what you do for a living?"
"Oh!!"
I laugh nervously.
"Are people curious about me?"
"I can imagine a poll is running somewhere."
I almost freak out but I see his expression and I start laughing.
"Ok, I'm just curious sue me."
"Well, I'm a writer."
Shut up Emilia, just shut up, you write under an assumed name for a reason.
"Really, can it be something I know?"
"I don't think so it's, you know, woman stuff."
"Women stuff? Isn't this sexist my dear?"
His eyes are twinkling beautifully, God save me from this man.
"It's romance and stuff." he just keeps looking at me steadily.
"Bare beauty." I sigh and he gives the most radiant smile.
We sit silently by the lake, still hand in hand for what seems like hours till we both decide without a word it's time to leave.
I blame myself for my stupidity for telling him the name of my story, but I somehow convince myself he was just being polite and he wouldn't read.
And if a small shameless part of me hoped he would read it and feel even a fraction of the insanity going through my mind, well we are all allowed a couple of vices.